It doesn’t matter how things ended or how long you were together, breakups are difficult. Some breakups hit incredibly hard, so if you still miss your ex after a very long time, know that you’re not alone. It has happened to many of us before and, trust us, it will end.
The process can take some time, though, but the day will come when you don’t even think about your ex anymore or, if you do, it doesn’t make you feel bad, lonely, or melancholic.
6 months seems like a long time, but you can’t really place a deadline on your grief. The end of a relationship is a loss; we all process that very differently. You thought that, by now, you’d be over your ex and things would be fine. If that’s not the case, what can you do moving forward?
Well, here are a few tips to help with that!
What to Do It’s Been 6 Months and You Still Miss Your Ex:
1. Understand that you don’t really miss them:
When it’s been 6 months or more and you still think about your ex, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you miss them or still love them. What you’re feeling goes a lot deeper than that. It’s not that you miss the person, is that you miss what you had and how things used to be.
You miss the person you were when you were together, feeling loved, the adventures you used to have with them, the intimacy, and so much more. The good news is that you don’t need your ex to get those things back. If you miss the person you used to be, what is it that your ex brought out in you?
You can nurture those qualities on your own through self-development. If you miss feeling loved, there are people who love you, you just have to reach out and spend time with them. If you miss the adventures, go seek new experiences! If you miss the intimacy, you can get back out there, explore your sexuality on your own while using protection, or find other ways to channel that energy.
2. Remember the future is exciting:
One of the things you probably miss the most about the relationship you used to have is that you felt secure in it. You two had a plan or a general idea of what your future would be like together. Now, all that is out the window and you’re having a hard time seeing what’s in store for you.
However blurry the future may seem at the moment, you have to remember that it’s full of endless possibilities. Shifting your mindset is key here. Not knowing what’s in store for you doesn’t have to be scary or sad, it can be exciting. You create your future with every decision you make, so it’s time to get back into action.
3. Reflect on how far you’ve come:
When your relationship ended, it probably felt like you were never going to be okay again and your life would always suck. Now you know that’s not true. Your world didn’t end just because that person is no longer with you and you’ve come a long way.
Even if you still miss your ex sometimes, you no longer cry yourself to sleep and you’ve been focusing on yourself. Little by little, you’ve been climbing up from rock bottom. So, look back at your journey and see how far you’ve come. You’ve done better than you thought you would at first, which means you’re on the right path. Eventually, missing them will be part of the past too.
4. You broke up for a reason:
In the end, you broke up for a reason. Reminding yourself of that reason is key in the process of moving on. When you find yourself missing your ex, only the good things come to mind. Well, you can correct that by reminding yourself of the things that led the relationship to a brutal breakup.
It’s not about denying the good things about your ex or the relationship you had, it’s about remembering why they’re no longer for you and putting things in perspective.
Everything happens for a reason, meaning that there’s a purpose to everything. That may sound cliché, but clichés are clichés because they’re true. Adversity and hardships lead to growth, breakups included, and something good always comes out of that. Reminding yourself of that can help you regulate your feelings and mood.
If it’s been 6 months and you still miss your ex, don’t fret about it. It doesn’t mean you haven’t made any progress. It just means there’s a bit more work to be done in order to achieve full closure, but you will get there! Just keep going.