For married couples, texting with people of the opposite gender can be a tricky situation or something they want to approach with caution. On the one hand, they want to be polite and friendly; on the other hand, they don’t want to take things too far.
But what exactly is “too far,” and how can couples navigate this tricky topic without getting into arguments or getting caught up in jealousy? To make things easier for you, let’s explore some of the unspoken rules of texting with members of the opposite gender when you’re married.
4 rules to text the opposite gender when you’re married:
1. Check with your partner if that’s something they don’t mind:
Rather than start chatting to someone online or texting them for months, only to be caught red-handed by your partner and look so guilty; why not bring up the topic and see how they feel about it first? Before you dive entirely into long texts and replies with your entire social media audience or followers, make sure you know how that would make your partner feel. This way you can act knowingly and accordingly to what is acceptable or not for your significant other. There’s no harm in establishing boundaries and what your partner defines as cheating or even micro-cheating, especially if your relationship is fairly new and you’re not sure yet!
Rather than create a mess that will spiral out of control, it’s important to establish that all parties of your couple are okay and comfortable with such behavior. Your partner will probably not say that they’re fully against it in any context or situation, they may have rules or allow you to only text colleagues about work matters. But in any case, they will surely not forbid you from texting the opposite gender altogether, especially if they see that you’re open to listening to their opinion which will also imply that you have nothing to hide.
2. Everything depends on who you’re texting:
Secondly, before you engage in texting back and forth make sure that you’re not doing it with someone that your significant other doesn’t like. This means that if someone initiates a text conversation with you, and they’re not someone who’s in your partner’s good books then you may want to keep things short and quick. You don’t want to become too friendly or even almost flirty with someone that has been publicly hostile with your partner or that doesn’t get along with them.
Just think about how it will make you feel if your partner went behind your back and developed a strong friendship with your sworn enemies. For this reason, if your spouse isn’t okay with you texting someone specific then it’s better to respect their wishes and don’t pursue further conversations with that specific person. It’s not worth risking your relationship for something as trivial as an exchange of text messages.
As we said, this rule applies both ways; if someone you dislike tries to initiate a text conversation with your spouse then your partner should let you know and inform you of the nature of the exchange. Respect your partner’s boundaries and never engage in conversations or exchanges that could be perceived as flirting or disrespectful to your relationship, in some way.
3. Be formal when texting with the opposite gender:
In addition to making sure both parties are comfortable with engaging in a conversation, it’s important to maintain professionalism at all times when interacting with members of the opposite gender via text message or any other medium.
So avoid using slang or overly casual language; keep conversations brief and polite, and always remember that anything you say could be used against you later on if things take an unexpected turn! It’s better to err on the side of caution than risk ruining your reputation and potentially your marriage. So make sure that you’re very cautious and try not to say something inappropriate or cross boundaries without realizing it.
4. Only text the opposite gender when you have a clear purpose in mind:
Fourthly, the way you text with other people should differ from how you communicate with your spouse. You cannot just text someone of the opposite gender, because you feel like it or because you want to ask what they’re doing with their day when you get bored. This is something you’re better off doing with your spouse alone. If you’re going to text the opposite gender, it’s better to only do it when you have a clear purpose in mind.
This is especially true for married men, as it can become a slippery slope that leads to infidelity or an emotional affair. It’s true that there are times when it is appropriate and even helpful to text someone of the opposite gender; you just need to make sure it’s done delicately and with purpose.
In other words, if you find yourself in a situation where you need to text the opposite gender, make sure that your intentions are clear and professional. Keep messages short and sweet. And, whatever you do, don’t get into lengthy conversations that could be interpreted as flirting. Also, avoid discussing anything too personal; try to just stick with business matters so there isn’t any confusion or misinterpretation by your spouse or anyone else who may see your messages.
Of course, this may all sound like too much to ask for. However, for many couples, it’s the only acceptable way of doing things, in order to avoid infidelity or even divulging too much information and exposing their couple’s privacy. If you need help with something and you’re in desperate need of texting someone then why not text your friends of the same gender or family members? If you do this you will be able to safely ask for help without worrying about crossing any lines.
All in all, texting people from the opposite gender while married requires a delicate balance between politeness and professionalism. While it can certainly be done without compromising either party’s integrity or relationship, it’s important to proceed cautiously and ensure that no boundaries are crossed. It is always smart to think about what your partner would think of every sentence before you type it and press send.
This way, you’re less luckily to make mistakes or say things that can be held against you later if your partner got wind of it all. If done correctly, there’s no reason why texting shouldn’t be allowed within marriage; but taking extra care will help make sure things stay friendly instead of flirty!