When your wife is being extra affectionate, it can make your day instantly. For many devoted husbands, it is the best feeling ever and it makes everything seem just enough. For a brief moment in time, everything else just seems to drift away and as a loving husband, you are filled with contentment. Each interaction brings you closer together and makes those moments even more special.
From a hug when you get home from work to bringing you your favorite snack on a lazy Saturday afternoon, tangible acts of love and appreciation can be game-changers for any relationship. Having that extra bit of comfort makes all the difference and makes life so much more interesting.
So how do you push your wife to be a little more affectionate without taking the risk of making things worse or implying that she isn’t doing enough already? Here we have the answers, so carry on reading!
5 steps to get your wife to be more affectionate:
1. Surprise her with a nice gesture:
One key strategy to make your wife more affectionate is to practice the art of thoughtful surprise. Every once in a while, buy her flowers for no occasion whatsoever; better yet, write her a handwritten love letter or pick out that thing she’s been wanting for ages and wrap it up with a big bow.
Thoughtful surprises may be small gestures, but they show your spouse that you are still thinking about them during the day and it will help you receive huge amounts of appreciation. Plus, they’ll quickly break the monotony of life and can really spark something.
As we said a surprise can be anything! It could be something like a surprise date night, a surprise weekend getaway, or even a surprise gift. Again, a surprise is unexpected and will give your wife the jolt she needs to show more affection toward you. Even if your relationship isn’t in dire need of affection, take the opportunity to show your wife special surprise acts of kindness. She will appreciate the little things you do and she will mirror this attention and do the same.
2. Be nicer, kinder and let her feel heard:
If you want your wife to be more affectionate, a second key strategy is to be gentle and never yell at her or treat her bad. Women can, unfortunately, find it hard to forget or forgive any harmful words or unnecessary scolding. It’s important to always communicate how you feel instead of holding it in, but there’s no need to argue either. Instead, try to learn to always give your wife the benefit of the doubt and to try and see her perspective on every matter before you disagree.
The more understanding and patient you are, the stronger your relationship will be and the more she’ll be able to show her love for you in meaningful ways. Let us add that it’s never a good idea to think of relationships like a business transaction; give something, get something. So don’t just be nicer to your spouse because you want her to be more affectionate. Being kind to your life partner will help make the love they have for you to deepen and the bond you share to be stronger.
So be kind to her. In fact, be extra kind and patient especially when she is going through an emotional time. Also, try to always do your best to make sure she feels heard by being considerate of her feelings. Remember that she may hold onto a grudge if she thinks you don’t respect her or that you treat her badly and this could make resentment slowly grow between the two of you. If this happens then it will naturally make her less affectionate toward you. You may find it hard at times but if you focus on the end goal of making your relationship healthier and it could be worth it in the long run.
3. Take the initiative first and be more expressive of your love:
Thirdly, if you want to bring more love and affection into your marriage then you should know that it starts with taking the initiative and expressing more of your own feelings. Being vocal about how much you appreciate the little things that your wife does carry a lot of weight. So take the time to examine your relationship objectively and figure out what habits would benefit from some intentional change.
Making an effort to be more open about expressing your emotions and vulnerabilities can lead to new levels of closeness in an existing relationship. What we mean is that you should always be willing to go for a hug or a forehead kiss and demonstrate your love in every possible way, not just during special occasions, but all year long! This will break any invisible barriers that have been slowly separating you and it will bring you closer.
In addition to this, allow yourself to be more intimate and to be heart-warming when communicating with her. Sometimes it’s hard for couples to be emotionally open, but expressing genuine love and appreciation will slowly transform your relationship into something wonderful.
4. Make more time for her:
A fourth and key step to making your wife more affectionate is to be more present and available. This is always a big determinant of how we feel about people and how we interact with them. So if you make sure to make more time for your wife specifically and to spend most of your free time with her, she will definitely notice and appreciate it. if you’re super busy with work then a dinner date or perhaps a weekend away can also do the trick. Hopefully, it will be more than enough to show her that you want to make her and the marriage a priority.
This will signal to her that your intentions and motives are clear and she will interpret this in a good way. She will probably think that you clearly enjoy her company more than anyone else’s which will delight her and even make her blush. If you invest more time and energy in her, chances are she’ll naturally become more expressive of her feelings for you and she will trust you enough to make bigger advances, if not just feel closer overall!
5. Have a heart-to-heart talk:
Finally, if all else fails a heart-to-heart discussion is one of the keys to unlocking more affection from your wife. Plan some quality time together where you’ll avoid distractions like phones or laptops, like a candle-lit date night at home. Once you two are sitting around a warm and hearty pasta dish feel free to bring up your best memories and revisit your past agreeable moments together.
After that feel free to discuss casual plans you have, such as things you already agreed on for the future of your relationship or an upcoming vacation you plan to take. At some point when your lovely dinner is almost finished, take the time to embrace your spouse’s hand and to let her know how important and precious she is to you. This will also be an opportunity for you to mention that you miss the days when she was perhaps more physical with you and more affectionate. Let her know how much you miss her warm touch and how small things like that make your day because of how much she means to you.
We advise you not be get shy or uncomfortable while saying things like this to your spouse, because honesty and an occasional show of vulnerability can only help your relationship grow stronger. Plus, making frequent heart-to-heart conversations a priority will also help to keep positive energy alive and growing in your marriage.
In the end, when it comes to relationships the key factor is communication. After all, communication is everything! But sometimes you might find that your companion isn’t as responsive to words as you would like them to be.
In those tough cases, don’t despair; instead, remember to try out the steps listed above. Whether it’s an act of kindness or communication that unlocks your spouse’s heart again, you’ll have to try both to get the answer. And remember that trying to communicate with them may not work at first especially if that’s not a skill you’ve worked on throughout your relationship.
So go ahead and try to show your romantic side first or simply follow the steps listed above in the right order. This way, you can get your spouse’s attention first and before you’re given the chance to say the right words that will hopefully make things right! Knowing how to use the right tools at hand can help bring back those smiles and make your relationship even more meaningful.