Oftentimes, people stay in unhappy relationships because they believe that things will eventually get better. However, sometimes this is just a pipe dream. Other times, people delay breaking up with their partner when the relationship is not fulfilling for other sillier reasons such as; being scared of how they’ll react to the break-up decision.
In fact, it can be tough to break up with someone, especially if you’re not sure how they’ll react but it shouldn’t deter you from breaking free. If you’re not in the same area, or if you’re just not ready to face them in person, breaking up over the phone may be your best option. Here are a few tips to make the process a little easier.
Steps to break up with someone over the phone:
1- Find the right time:
First, try to find a time when you know they’ll be alone and won’t be interrupted. You don’t want to do this while they’re at work or in the middle of something important.
This could be early in the morning or late at night. If it’s early in the morning, make sure that they don’t have an important day ahead. You don’t want them to call in sick or have an important life event ruined because of this. So if you want to do it early in the morning, make sure it’s a day off for them or a boring one.
Choosing the right time is crucial as you don’t want to do it while they’re with friends or family either. You want them to be alone for sure, as they may cry or get emotional. Plus, they probably don’t want to involve others in their private matters straight away.
They have a right to privacy so let them know in private and from there they can decide what they want to do and who to share the news with if they want to support.
2- Be direct and straight to the point:
Second, be direct and honest. It’s okay to be apologetic, but don’t try to make excuses or play down your feelings. Tell them clearly that you’re no longer interested in dating and explain why.
You don’t want to beat around the bush or try to be subtle, because that will only make things more difficult and confusing. Be clear about your reasons for breaking up, and be firm in your decision.
It’s also important to be respectful and understanding too. This isn’t an easy conversation to have, but it’s important to be as kind as possible. Remember that there is no perfect way to break up with someone, but being direct and honest is always the best policy.
Remember, this doesn’t have to turn into a 3 hours argument where they try to convince you to stay or do some horrible name-calling and get enraged. All it can be, if they’re taking it in a bad way is a one-way statement. Once you’ve said your piece, you can hang up the phone.
It’s okay to be brief. In fact, it’s probably better to be brief. This way, there’s less of a chance for things to get heated or for them to start crying. breaking up is never easy, but sometimes it’s necessary. so, if you need to do it, just remember to be honest and direct. There’s no need to drag it out or make it more painful than it needs to be. Just be clear, concise, and be done with it.
3- Be prepared for any reaction:
Before you make the call, it’s important to be prepared for any reaction. The person you’re breaking up with may be angry, hurt, or even relieved. Once you’ve considered how they might react, it’s time to take the plunge and make the call.
Start by telling them that you need to talk to them about something important. Then, explain your decision calmly and clearly. If they become emotional but are still kind and polite, try to talk with them and stay calm and respectful.
So be prepared for them to react negatively. They may get angry or upset, and they may say things they don’t really mean. Just try to stay calm and remember that this is what’s best for both of you in the long run. As we mentioned in the point above, if it becomes too overwhelming for you; and you have said everything you needed to then you can choose to hang up and continue the discussion by text.
Whatever their reaction, try to remain well-behaved. Breaking up with someone is never easy, but doing it over the phone can be a quick and painless way to end things.
4- Offer to talk it out in person but don’t give them hope:
Fourth, if you want you can offer to talk about it more later if they need some time to process everything. Giving them some type of closure can help you both move on faster but make sure it’s done in a public place.
Meet for a bite, have the talk and then go your separate ways after that. No need to go home together or meet in a private space as it could complicate things more if you got physical or if they got aggressive, etc.
Meeting in a public place will also help to keep the conversation from getting too emotionally charged. Whatever you do, make sure you don’t give them hope that things could still work out. Be firm and honest about your decision to break up and make it clear that if you meet it will only be to answer any questions they may have and to wish them good luck.
5- Don’t force yourself to come up with excuses and reasons:
And finally, don’t feel like you need to give them an explanation for why things aren’t working out; sometimes it’s just better to move on.
Some people would argue that having a few solid reasons for ending the relationship will make it easier for both of you to accept. However, that’s not necessary. Breaking up when nothing is wrong is valid too, check this article out on it.
Maybe you’re just not happy or feeling fulfilled in your relationship. Or, maybe you don’t think you and your partner are compatible enough. The point is that breaking up when nothing seems to be wrong is okay. You could simply need space or want to see other people and that’s fine.