Being in a relationship can be scary. You’re opening yourself up to someone else, and you don’t know how they’re going to react. Will they accept you for who you are? Or will they try to change you into someone else? There’s no way of answering this question but you can cross that bridge when you get to it.
Until then you have to understand that worrying about being yourself is pointless as your partner could also not like the facade that you put on. In fact, maybe they’re a perfect match with your true genuine peronsality but how would you know that if you never allow yourself to be real?
This is why you should do your absolute best to be authentic with your partner. If the relationship is built on a foundation of lies and deception, eventually, those lies will come out, and everything will crumble.
Don’t be afraid to let your true self shine in a relationship by following the steps below:
5 Steps to be yourself in a relationship:
1- Never lie about what you like and don’t:
Lying about your likes and dislikes is a very bad idea as it can make it difficult to be yourself around your partner. This is because you’ll never be able to fully enjoy the things you actually like, as long as your partner is around.
This will not only deprive you of true entertainment but it can also make you build resentment for your partner for barely being present near you all the time. You will be waiting for them to go elsewhere, so you can finally catch your breath and do what you like.
The same goes for lying about things you actually don’t like and claiming that you do. This will force you to spend your time with your partner doing these things when you don’t actually enjoy them. Not only can this be a waste of your time, but it can also be frustrating and draining too.
When you’re not being yourself, it’s also hard to gauge whether or not the other person is truly compatible with you. So save yourself the trouble and just be yourself from the beginning.
2- Never lie about your background and upbringing:
Another thing you should do is to never lie about your background or feel any type of shame or embarassement because of the way you were raised. Anything you went through as a child is clearly not your fault. So come to terms with that and be confident in yourself. For example, poverty isn’t even your parents or guardians’ fault either.
So if you were disadvantaged or grew up in a poor family, then the’re no need to lie about things you have never experienced before. You don’t need to claim to have had a prestigious upbringing if you really didn’t, for instance. However, you don’t need to expose your past unnecesarily if you don’t want to either.
The point is that when you’re asked don’t lie about having played a music instrument or a sport when you never did. You shouldn’t feel the need to lie about how your childhood was or try to embellish it in some way. For instance, if your partner asks if you ever played tennis before or went to a specific restaurant or country; then there’s no need to pretend to have done such a thing.
Having done specific things in your past that could be a testament to how amazing your childhood was or how privileged your family was, will not benefit you in any way. You may even get caught if asked more questions because you don’t know the details.
This type of advice sounds silly and absurd but there are many people that like to embellish their family social status and lie about their upbringing even when they go on dates. A strong avidence of that is just how many people are trying today to show off a lifestyle that they don’t really have and lie about it on social media. In the end, when you get close enough to a romantic partner they will end up knowing your truth and you will end up looking like a fool for having lied about such insignificant things.
Adults that you meet will only judge your status, social class or prominence based on your own career and achievements. Nobody really cares about whether you traveled the world as a child, if you never been to a different city than where you live since your 18 birthday. This is why you have to learn that being accepted for your genuine personality is far better than being liked because of your family alleged financial situation, network or power.
In addition, being honest about your past can help avoid any painful surprises down the road. Imagine if your partner found out that you had lied about something significant. It would not only damage trust, but it could also cause a lot of pain and conflict.
3- Always be honest about your feelings and thoughts:
Being honest about your feelings, thoughts and opinions helps to build trust between you and your partner. If you’re constantly hiding parts of yourself, it can be difficult to feel truly close to someone.
So, it’s always best to just be upfront and honest from the beginning. That way, you can build a strong foundation of trust and intimacy in your relationship.Trying to act like someone you’re not is not only difficult, but it’s also incredibly exhausting.
It also literally requires keeping a notbook where you write down all the false opinions you pretend to have on different topics, just in case it comes up again in the future. This is why it’s jsut not sustainbale or smart to lie about the way you perceive things and your true thinking process.
Sooner or later, your true self is bound to come out, and when it does, it can be confusing and upsetting for both of you. Being yourself from the start is the best way to ensure that you’re in a relationship with someone who likes and accepts you for who you are. It may not always be easy, but it’s always worth it.
4- Practice self-love:
One of the best ways to be yourself in a relationship is to practice self-love. When you love and accept yourself, it becomes easier to share your true self with your partner. You also become more comfortable setting boundaries and communicating your needs.
Ultimately, self-love provides the foundation for a healthy and supportive relationship. So if you’re looking for ways to be more authentic in your relationship, start by turning inward and giving yourself the love and care that you deserve.
Also, you have to understand that one way to practice self-love while in a relationship could be to set boundaries with your partner. It’s important to nurture and care for yourself first, in order to be able to fully give to another person.
By setting boundaries, you are saying that you respect yourself enough to not allow someone to take advantage of you or your time. If a relationship starts to feel one-sided, it might be time to reevaluate things. Of course, it’s okay and necessary to compromise sometimes, but it’s important to know when to draw the line. It’s also a good idea to keep up with your hobbies and interests, even if they don’t necessarily align with your partner’s.
5- Be very expressive of yourself:
In the end, the point of being yourself in a relationship is that you want to be with someone who loves you for who you are, not who you pretend to be. So don’t hesitate to be very expressive and talkative with your partner. This way, there will be no room left for misinterpretation and they will know exactly who you are, how you feel, what you want, etc.
It’s also important to be honest about your feelings. If you’re unhappy about something, tell them. Don’t bottle it up until it explodes.
Communication is key in any relationship, so make sure you’re always open and honest with your partner. They’ll appreciate it, and it will help to create a strong bond between the two of you. It’s true that being expressive can be challenging at times, but it is an important part of being genuine and authentic. When you are able to be yourself in a relationship, it can lead to a more meaningful and lasting connection.
Bottom line:
Being yourself in a relationship can be tricky. After all, you’re trying to balance getting to know your partner while also maintaining your own sense of identity.
However, by following the steps above you can easily find the balance needed to please both yourself and your partner. You can check this article out too, if you’re already in a relationship where you feel to have lsot a part of who you are and your identity. It will help you find yourself again in a relaionship.