Happiness is a subjective experience. What makes one person happy may not make another person happy. One of the most interesting concepts about happiness is finding out what triggers happiness and how you can achieve it.
The most common, and most expected, way to be happy is to have expectations that are met or exceeded. People are less likely to be happy when they feel they deserve better than they have or when they feel there is too much pressure on them.
Our society has shifted from being dependent on circumstances and other people’s judgment to being happy to depend on ourselves and our own perspective. This shift can be good but it has also brought a decline in our human values such as courtesy, kindness, thoughtfulness, etc. This has led to an increase in rudeness and impatience around us. Not just among strangers but also at home with family members and friends.
How to be happy or at least less sad?
1- Happiness is a journey:
We have to realize that happiness is not a destination. We sometimes expect it to happen overnight; we set unrealistic goals and then fail miserably when these expectations are not met.
People often believe that happiness is something that you need to chase, but it’s more about believing in yourself and your capabilities. If you want your own good, believe in yourself and don’t expect it to happen overnight–it might take a while but eventually, you’ll get what you want.
2- It comes from within:
We are surrounded by a lot of things that draw our attention and make us happy. We often believe that happiness is something we have to work hard for, but that might not always be the case.
The thing is, happiness doesn’t have to come from external sources – it can come from within. It’s not something you can just expect to be handed to you on a silver platter because it’s impossible to put in what you don’t have.
Through the study of happiness and what makes people happy, scientists have discovered that happiness is not something that’s out there but rather in your mind.
3- Focus on what you have:
The data which was collected by Silicon Valley companies on the happiness levels of their employees show that happiness occurs when people stop focusing on what they don’t have and instead focus on what they do have.
When people focus on what they don’t have or compare their lives to others, they can feel ungrateful and unhappy. In a study conducted by Psych Central, scientists found out that people who expect to be happy are actually more likely to be happy. Why? Because it is difficult for people to deny the good things in their life and things they worked hard for.
When we work hard for something and end up obtaining exactly what we wanted, then it is hard to nitpick and find something else to be unhappy about. Being grateful, and learning to applaud your own self and pat yourself on the back for your hard work and what you have can go a long way in making you happy.
4- Let go of the past:
In order for us to be happy, we should be willing to forgive others and let go of the past. We should always try to make an effort in this direction to find happiness.
The fact is that humans are complex creatures. Our feelings will change from moment to moment, sometimes we may get triggered by something in the present that will bring back a horrible experience from the past or childhood trauma. It is important to know how to get over this type of experience and not let the past haunt you.
5- Work towards your goals:
Studies show that most people who have accomplished their goals are highly satisfied with their lives and are happy. They do not need to have a lot of money or material possessions to be happy.
Celebrating your achievements can make you feel great and give you a sense of accomplishment. You don’t need to rely on anyone else’s opinion or recognition, as long as you know what you went through to make it all happen and as long as you succeed in the end.
Sometimes it’s difficult to tell when we are successful. But you can be sure in knowing when you make progress towards your goal. Once you get over the initial hump, it’s easier to enjoy life, because you know that your hard work is paying off.
Make a list of all the things you are grateful for in your life. This will help you to realize that happiness is not something that should be pursued, or obtained but it is something that you may already have access to.
As the saying goes, happiness is a choice. It is up to you to decide if you are happy or not. You have to learn how to be happy by yourself. Some people think that happiness is just a state of having it all and never having any problems. But this kind of idea doesn’t work in reality, because there will always be problems in our lives that we cannot avoid.
So what we can do is find solutions to these problems and work towards a better future, while still enjoying the present as it is, instead of focusing on being unhappy all the time.