Breakups are tricky enough as it is, but going through a second breakup with the same person can be even more difficult. Not only do you have to deal with the same type of pain twice, but you also have to deal with the sense of failure that comes with not being able to make things work the second time around.
It can be tempting to try to hold on to what you had before, but it’s important to remember that you’re not the first person to go through a second breakup and you won’t be the last. Take the time to grieve, allow yourself to be angry, and then move on, once and for all. No third chance should be given and in this case, the third time is not a charm.
It might be easy to reach out again looking for another chance, again and again, but it’s not worth it in the end. So read on and see for yourself how you can deal with a second breakup with the same person and why it’s not ideal.
Is it worth it to stay with someone with whom you broke up twice already?
1- Your ex didn’t change:
There are plenty of reasons why someone might choose not to give their ex a third chance after breaking up twice with them already. For one thing, your ex probably didn’t have enough time to grow and change since your last break-up. They’re the same person that hurt you and broke up with you twice. This type of on-again-off-again relationship can be not only emotionally draining but also damaging to your self-esteem.
This kind of relationship is often unhealthy and based on a cycle of one person taking advantage of the other. If you’ve already broken up twice, it’s likely that this dynamic hasn’t changed, and giving them a third chance is only setting yourself up for more pain. It’s better to move on and find someone who respects you and won’t take advantage of your goodwill.
Unfortunately, more often than not, history repeats itself. Once a cheater always a cheater; once a liar always a liar. If someone has broken your trust twice, it’s unlikely that they’ll be able to change their ways and earn your trust back.
That doesn’t mean that they can’t change in general, but it’s not worth taking the chance on someone who has already hurt you so much. So if you’re wondering whether or not you should give someone a third chance after they’ve broken up with you twice, the answer is probably no. Unless, of course, you’re prepared to get hurt again.
2- It will only become harder to let go:
If you’ve broken up with someone twice, it’s probably not a good idea to give them a third chance. Not only are you setting yourself up for disappointment, but you’re also allowing yourself to be pulled back into a toxic cycle. This type of toxic cycles could be very ahrd ot break.
On-again, off-again relationships are characterized by periods of intense highs and lows. One minute you’re on top of the world, and the next you’re wondering what went wrong. This rollercoaster ride can be exhilarating, but it’s also exhausting. And it’s not sustainable in the long run. So if you’ve already broken up with someone twice, it’s probably time to move on for good.
You’ll get back together, they’ll hurt you again, you’ll break up, and the cycle will repeat. It’s not worth it to put yourself through that again and again. Especially when there are plenty of other people out there who could be a better match with you. So if you’ve been unlucky in love twice, with the same person, take the hint and don’t be afraid to move on. You will probably find someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
Additionally, each time you get back together, you end up right back where you started, which can be frustrating and discouraging.
3- Just delaying the inevitable:
After two breakups, you might be tempted to give the person a third chance. But is that really a good idea? More often than not, it just ends up delaying the inevitable. If you’ve already broken up twice, there’s a good chance you’ll break up again.
And each time, it will be that much harder to move on because you’ll be secretly waiting for a new reconciliation again, no matter how much time passes. So ask yourself, do you really believe you can make it work this time? Or are you just setting yourself up for more heartache down the road?
Be honest and tell yourself whether you think this fairytale is supposed to last a lifetime without issues, after these two bad breakups. Yes, a miracle could take place but are you gonna risk everything including your youth, energy, and time again for a miracle that may or may never come true?
When you look at a happy old couple, do you think that they have broken up a zillion times through their long marriage or relationship? Or, do you assume they worked on it and made it work through thick and thin?
4- You should trust your gut:
When it comes to relationships, sometimes it’s best to trust your gut. If you’ve broken up with someone twice, it’s probably not worth giving them a third chance. Most people who end up in that situation have some major trust issues. And trust is one of the most important components of a healthy relationship.
If you can’t trust your partner not to break up with you again, at the first sight of a problem, then the relationship is doomed to fail. So if you find yourself in a situation where you’re considering giving someone a third chance, ask yourself if you really think things will be different this time around. If the answer is no, then it’s probably not worth your time.
Also, it’s important to trust your gut when it comes to relationships. If you have doubts about getting back together with your ex, it’s probably best to listen to your intuition and move on.
5- They won’t respect your boundaries:
After breaking up with someone, it can be tempting to give them another chance. After all, you may think that they have changed or that they truly understand your needs this time. However, there is one good reason why you should avoid giving someone a third chance after they have broken your trust twice.
The reason is that they will likely not respect your boundaries. You will have a hard time making your ex respect your wants, wishes, and boundaries and make them meet your expectations. That’s because they will think they can do anything and still get back together with you.
They will not say it directly, but they may not be willing to change their behavior, which means the relationship will just end up in the same place as before. This is especially true now that they’ve given you good reasons to leave them on two different occasions and yous till stuck around.
Ultimately, giving someone a third chance is usually more trouble than it’s worth, mainly because they take you for granted and think that nothing they can do is bad enough to make you leave. In the end, you can check this article out if you feel guilty to move on from your ex because you got too familiarised to never truly leaving them behind.