Going through a breakup is never easy, and it can be even harder when you’ve been through it multiple times already, with the same person. If you’re wondering if your latest break-up is final, there are a few things to consider.
When you already had multiple breakups, how to tell it’s final?
1- Think if there’s an underlying issue that couldn’t be solved:
First, think about how many times you’ve broken up in the past. If it’s only been once or twice at most, it’s possible that you just need some time apart to work on yourselves.
However, if you’ve been through an endless cycle of breaking up and getting back together, it might be time to call it quits for good even if your ex reaches out for reconciliation. Additionally, think about the reasons behind your breakups. Are they always the same? If so, it’s likely that there’s an underlying issue that you’re not able to resolve.
In case, there’s an underlying issue that you keep breaking up because, for instance, if your partner is very controlling or if their family hates you, then it’s likely you’ll break up again and again. Unless this issue is solved, the two of you will keep breaking up continuously and suffering.
2- Think if you just got in the habit of ending things every time:
Anyone who has ever been in an on-again-off-again relationship knows how confusing it can be. One day you’re together and the next day you’re not, and it’s hard to know if you’re breaking up for real this time or if it’s just a temporary thing.
Sometimes it seems like you’re breaking up out of habit more than anything else. Other times it feels like there’s something more going on. It can be hard to tell what’s really going on in an on-again-off-again relationship, but if it feels like you broke up again because it was simply time for another separation; then it’s probably minor. It’s no secret that the two of you have a vicious cycle by now.
And although, it’s toxic and unhealthy to be in such a relationship; it’s important to be able to recognize if you just broke up because you’ve been going strong for a little longer than usual this time. So maybe it felt unfamiliar and weird so a break-up had to take place once more to regulate things again and make you two fall into the habit of getting on and off again. Maybe things feel more familiar and normal this way for you two.
3- Think if the reason for the break-up was minor and silly:
Breaking up with someone can be really tough, especially if you’ve been through it multiple times with the same person. It’s hard to know when it’s truly over for good, but another good telltale sign can be the reason for the break-up. So think about whether it was just another silly argument or something more serious.
If it was something minor that you’ve fought about because one of you was in a bad mood already, then it’s probably not worth breaking up permanently. However, if it was something bigger that caused a major disagreement, it might be time to believe that it’s serious this time.
4- How much effort are each one of you willing to put to fix things:
Another thing to consider is how much effort each of you is willing to put into fixing the relationship. If one person isn’t interested in working on things, it’s probably not worth trying again. Ultimately, only you can decide whether it’s worth giving it another shot or if it’s time to move on for good.
In other words, ask yourself how you feel after the breakup. Are you relieved? Sad? Angry? If you’re feeling more positive than negative, it’s a good sign that this breakup is final. In this case, you shouldn’t do anything to get back together and just cut ties and start the no-contact rule. Breaking up is never easy, but sometimes it’s for the best.
5- Think if one of you just needs a breather:
Breaking up and getting back together again is a never-ending cycle for some couples. It can be hard to tell if you’re breaking up for some space and time apart or because it’s for real. Sometimes it feels like you’re breaking up just because it’s the only way the two of you get a breather or a break from the toxicity that comes with an on-again-off-again-relationship, but other times it feels like the right thing to do.
If you’re stuck in an on-again-off-again relationship, it’s important to step back and assess your situation. Ask yourself if breaking up is something you really want or if it’s just a usual knee-jerk reaction to a problem that can be fixed.
If breaking up is what you really want, then do it. But if all you want is space and time apart to be able to catch your breath again then maybe it’s time to communicate and fix the relationship rather than allow it to be so toxic and stay in it. So check this article out and see how much space is needed in a relationship to ensure you and your partner have enough space. This way you will not need to find excuses and break up every month or two to even get a breather.