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6 signs your roommate doesn’t like you

6 signs your roommate doesn’t like you

You get along great with your roommate, they’re friendly and you even agree on a few rules to keep sharing the same roof peacefully. But something just doesn’t feel right. They seem to actively avoid you or give you the cold shoulder when you try to hang out with them one-on-one.

It sucks, but this happens more often than you think. It happens when a roommate doesn’t necessarily like or appreciate the person they’re living with. So perhaps, they don’t even see you as a friend; maybe you’re more of a competitor than a pal who lives in the same space as them.

If this sounds like your situation, don’t panic! There are ways to salvage this strange quasi-friendship and make it into something that feels less like an awkward acquaintance and more like a real partner in residence. But first, let’s look at some signs that your roommate doesn’t like you for sure.

Signs your roommate doesn’t like you:

1. They only communicate the necessary with you:

When you live with a roommate it’s expected that you end up forming a friendship and you will get along most of the time. You start sharing your lives and telling each other how your days are and what’s new. But if your roommate doesn’t like you, your conversations will be reduced to the minimum instead.

The only time your roommate will talk to you or address you is to ask or check something about the place you share and its management. Otherwise, your roommate will keep to themselves and avoid being in the same room as you too, if possible.

2. They don’t care about your boundaries:

When you are sharing your house with a roommate it’s normal to create boundaries so you can both be able to live happily in the same space. Maybe you divide your house chores as well as the groceries expenses or find a similar middle ground.

Maybe you will even set some rules like no shoes in the house or no smoking inside. All these boundaries would be agreed upon between you and your roommate so you can both feel comfortable at home. But if your roommate doesn’t like you, their willingness in complying with the house rules will be inexistent.

When you see that your roommate is crossing the boundaries you once set together or when you bring it up to them they don’t look guilty, you can be sure that they couldn’t care less. Not only that, but maybe they don’t respect you anymore and possibly because they don’t like you. 

3. They don’t warn you about guests:

When sharing a roof you need to also share the times when you are planning to invite people over. Not only that but you may have different schedules and having guests could interfere with that. If circumstances were normal, your roommate would double-check with you if you were okay with them bringing people over.

But, a good sign that your roommate doesn’t like you is that they don’t even let you know or give you a heads-up that people may be coming over. And, the next thing you know; you come home after a long tiring day, maybe not ready to socialize or meet new people and there are 4 stangers sitting in the kitchen or living room.

If you come home and you find your house full of people that your roommate invited and that you were not warned about; then it means your roommate has no consideration for your feelings. One way you can be sure of this is if your roommate knew that you had to wake up early the next day or if you needed the house empty on that day, and they still didn’t care enough or bothered to let you know.

4. They judge everything you do:

Much like when your roommate doesn’t like you, they will avoid talking to you as much as possible, and they will also make unnecessary mean comments when you are doing something around the house.

For example, if you are cooking, even if it’s just for you and your roommate enters the kitchen, they could make a negative comment about the smell of the food. Doing something petty like that can be an easy attack that they attempt as they probably know that you wouldn’t fight them over something so silly. But still, they wouldn’t miss a chance to talk down to you, make fun of your ways or where you come from, and make it out to be a joke or innocent remark.

If your roommate is trying to be more subtle at showing their dislike for you, they will judge you on every other small thing too. These could be the shows or movies you like to watch or even a specific piece of clothing you are wearing. 

5. They aren’t considerate of your schedule:

When we live alone we are completely free to do whatever we want in our house and at any time of the day. However, when you have a roommate, one of the first things you do is exchange schedules so you both know when not to disturb each other. If your roommate doesn’t like you, they will certainly not feel very inclined to respect your routine.

Some ways your roommate can disturb you deliberately is by listening to music or watching tv very loud without headphones, during your supposed sleeping hours. If you only have one bathroom, your roommate will keep it occupied right at the time when you need to use it.

This could be in the morning if you need to get out of the house first, or at the end of the day, if you have the habit of taking a shower when you arrive home, for example.

6. They give you snarky remarks:

If your roommate doesn’t like you, it’s not likely that they will keep quiet about it for too long. Sooner or later they will start making snarky remarks that will seem to come out of the blue to you but they are doing it to make you understand why they don’t like you.

They could start blaming you for always spending too much time in the bathroom, or something as silly as having a specific fashion taste. In other words, you’ll be able to tell that they cannot stand you and that you just being you make their skin crawl.

If this starts creating a tense and potentially toxic environment, consider confronting your roommate about it. If you don’t have a serious talk about this, the situation can become unbearable and one of you will eventually have to leave. And of course, if you can, consider living on your own as it’s always better than having a roommate, even if this one was your absolute best friend.

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