It can be really sad if you don’t love yourself or if you even think that you don’t. You could be on top of the world but still not be satisfied with yourself and who you are. In this tragic scenario of life, it might feel like nothing will ever make you happy.
But, the moment you realize that you need to make an active effort to love yourself more is very crucial! It will either change your life for the better overnight or it will make you sadder by the minute and it’ll just be a downwards spiral from there.
The choice is in your hands! It can be depressing and it might look like nothing is worth it anymore. But, again you also have to make more efforts to get out of that mindset and learn to accept and love yourself more. But before you can do that, let’s confirm whether your doubt about how much you love yourself is true or false:
5 signs that you don’t love yourself:
1- You’re too harsh on yourself:
You know you don’t love yourself enough when you’re too unforgiving and harsh on yourself. You beat yourself up for every little mistake, and you never give yourself a break. You always feel like you’re not doing enough or not reaching your full potential. Or, maybe you think you are reaching your full potential but it’s still not enough so you criticize yourself, your work, and your efforts even more.
You don’t love yourself enough if you can’t see your own worth, and if you’re always putting yourself through an impossible standard. Give yourself a break, and learn to love yourself for who you are: imperfections and all. In fact, it’s very hard for an outsider to see your worth and learn to love you if they see that you yourself are not sure about whether you’re good enough to deserve your own love.
You might think that by being hard on yourself, you’re motivating yourself to do better. But in reality, all you’re doing is setting yourself up for failure. You’re always setting the bar too high, and as a result, you never feel like you’re good enough. You’re always scrutinizing yourself, looking for flaws, and criticizing your every move.
This inner dialogue is incredibly damaging, and it’s a clear sign that you need to start loving yourself. Instead of nitpicking every little thing, try to focus on your positive qualities. Accept that you’re not perfect, and learn to talk to yourself like you would to someone you love and respect a lot. If you want to learn to do just that then check this article out later on a few reasons to talk to yourself like someone you love. You deserve it.
2- You blame yourself for any bad experiences in your past:
One certain sign you don’t love yourself is if you find a way to blame yourself for anything bad that happened in your past. In other words, not only do you not forgive yourself for small mistakes you could’ve made in the past but you also find a way to blame yourself for other people’s mistakes that have affected your life.
For example, if someone you loved deceived you, you’ll find a way to attribute the blame to your intelligence or to you have done something wrong that turned them against you. Moreover, let’s say you were bullied in school, even then you’d think it’s because you were too weak or couldn’t defend yourself.
Or, maybe you didn’t get that job you really wanted then you’ll think it’s because you’re not smart enough or you’re not pretty enough. Whatever it is, if you’re finding a way to blame yourself, it’s a sign you don’t love yourself. All you’re doing is looking at every unfortunate past situation and thinking about what you could’ve done differently, and in this case, you’re just beating yourself up for something that’s already happened and that you can’t change.
If you want to start loving yourself, try to be more mindful of the things you say to yourself and look for ways to build yourself up instead of tearing yourself down.
3- You compare yourself to others a lot:
Another sign that you don’t love yourself is toxic comparison to others. This happens when you’re constantly looking at other people and feeling like you’re not good enough. You compare your accomplishments to theirs and feel like you’ll never measure up.
As a result, you never feel good enough and always feel inferior. This toxic comparison can lead to a spiral of negative self-talk and low self-esteem. If you find yourself constantly comparing yourself to others, it’s a sign that you need to learn to love and appreciate yourself for who you are.
If you’re constantly comparing yourself to others then it might be time to pay closer attention to other people’s flaws. Only then, you’ll see that nobody is perfect!
4- You always deny yourself nice things and treats:
If you’re always putting yourself down and convincing yourself that you’re not worthy of love or happiness, then it’s a red flag. Maybe, you think that you have to be perfect in order to be deserving of love, and so you never allow yourself to relax or get a treat.
In your book, any type of treat is definitely undeserved, be it a massage or something different. It will always be out of the question. You never give yourself a chance to just be, and to just get a nice reward for being positive and happy. You’re always stressed out and exhausted and putting impossible conditions on yourself to even deserve the smallest enjoyment.
Another example is that you might feel like you don’t deserve to treat yourself to a nice meal or a new outfit, even though you can afford it. Additionally, you might find yourself making excuses not to do things that you enjoy, such as going for walks or taking a yoga class. If you catch yourself doing these things, it may be a sign that you need to take some time to show yourself some self-love and care.
5- You put almost anyone else before yourself and needs:
One last and certain sign that you don’t love yourself is you always put anyone else before yourself. You’re always willing to finish last and you think that’s perfectly normal.
You always do things for other people and you never think about what you want or need. You’re always putting yourself in situations where you’re not comfortable because you don’t want to upset someone else. You never speak up for yourself because you don’t want to cause any drama.
It’s always about other people and what they want or need and you never put yourself first. If you truly loved yourself, you would put your own happiness above anyone else’s. Well, at least occasionally. So learn to do what makes you happy instead of always trying to please everyone else.
In the end, if these signs apply to you then we recommend you urgently check this article for reasons to love yourself more.