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5 Signs that someone is emotionally unintelligent

5 Signs that someone is emotionally unintelligent

Emotional intelligence refers to the ability people have to manage emotions effectively. Emotionally intelligent people are in tune with their emotions, so they understand them very well and can self-regulate them. 

This allows them not only to manage their feelings but also to acknowledge and empathize with other people’s feelings. Emotionally intelligent people are usually more equipped to handle problems and influence others positively. 

Overall, emotional intelligence is essential not only when relating to others, but also in understanding yourself and your inner world. As such, this is one of the best characteristics to work on and look for in others. 

Today, we will discuss 5 signs that someone is emotionally unintelligent. Often, these people can be difficult to connect with. So, if you’re having trouble with someone or you find them inconsiderate, irritating, and unlikeable, it could be because they lack emotional intelligence. 

5 Signs of Emotionally Unintelligent People:

1. They Are Not Very Self-Aware:

One of the signs that someone is emotionally unintelligent is their lack of self-awareness. These are the kind of people who always want to be right, even when they’re wrong. They are constantly arguing with others and defending their point of view without entertaining the opinions of others. 

When people have a hard time expressing their feelings or relating to what others are experiencing, it can be difficult for them to accept any other opinion but their own. This could be seen as an extreme lack of compassion.

Additionally, this type of people are often unable to learn from their mistakes and they would even deny them entirely. This can lead to problems in relationships of any kind because it’s difficult to relate to someone who can’t budge or accept whenever they’ve done something wrong. 

2. They Can Be Insensitive:

Emotionally unintelligent people are unable to relate to other people’s emotions. As such, they can’t tell when their behavior is appropriate or inappropriate. They often come off as insensitive because they say or do the wrong things. For example, emotionally unintelligent people can be harsh when they speak the truth or make jokes at inappropriate times. 

This is one of the biggest signs someone is emotionally unintelligent and it’s very easy to identify. Since they don’t understand other people’s feelings, they are also defensive about the insensitive things they do or say.

For them, it’s not a big deal, they don’t see the problem in embarrassing others or walking all over their needs and wants.

3. They Don’t Hold Themselves Accountable:

Another good sign that someone is emotionally unintelligent is their ability to always blame others. Since they’re unable to understand other people’s situations and they lack self-awareness, they can be quite troublesome. They never hold themselves accountable because they don’t think they’re wrong.

If something happens, emotionally unintelligent people are quick to blame others and defend themselves. They often claim others just misunderstood them or that they’re too sensitive. For example, let’s say you ask a friend to get your favorite ice cream. 

If they get the wrong one, it’s not their fault. You’re the one who knows what you like. The mistake they made is not a big issue, especially if you didn’t specify what flavor you want. In the end, it could’ve been avoided if you got the ice cream yourself.

However, if you’re emotionally unintelligent you could feel your friend should’ve known better and you could be upset or irritated for hours.

4. They Are Explosive:

Emotionally unintelligent people have trouble not only identifying emotions but also regulating them. That means they are explosive and they tend to lose control when they feel something intensely. After all, they don’t know how to cope with their feelings because they’re not in touch with them. 

This makes people very unpredictable. For example, if an emotionally unintelligent person is upset about something, it can lead to major outbursts. Additionally, they can be triggered very easily and they have a difficult time letting go. 

In fact, most emotionally unintelligent people have anger issues and that’s because they’re not in control of their feelings, thoughts, and actions. Even worse all of these don’t align sometimes for them and they are left doing contradictory things or things that won’t benefit them in the long term.

This means their outbursts can go on for hours. As you can imagine, that can be emotionally draining for people around them. It is extremely difficult to meet someone halfway when they’re unable to take any steps towards you and keep blaming you instead. 

5. They Struggle to Connect With Others:

Emotionally unintelligent people don’t have the best social skills. In fact, they struggle to connect with others. They often don’t have friends or close friends because they can’t build an emotional connection. This makes it difficult for them to have meaningful relationships. 

Relationships are based on support and an understanding of the other person’s emotions. Without these characteristics, relationships become very difficult to maintain. If someone can’t understand you, it’s very difficult to find a middle ground. 

Additionally, emotionally unintelligent people can be very self-centered and extremely difficult to reason with. They can’t see eye to eye with others, which makes communication and mutual understanding an uphill battle in the best-case scenario. 


Once you know what to look for, emotionally unintelligent people are very easy to spot.

Honestly, they don’t make the best friends, partners, or colleagues. So, unless they’re aware and willing to work on their emotional intelligence, you should keep your distance.

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