It is difficult for a man to understand that his wife may love him but not desire him. This can be because of the lack of romance, or it could be because she feels that he does not take care of himself and doesn’t make an effort to look good for her, anymore. However, these are only 3 possible reasons in an endless sea of possibilities.
In fact, there are many reasons why a woman may love her husband but not desire him sexually. That’s why today we will explore the most common reasons for this harsh borderline rejection and find out why your wife or girlfriend loves you but doesn’t desire you in an intimate way.
5 reasons why she loves you but doesn’t desire you:
1- You let yourself go:
You really let yourself go since you got comfortable in your relationship. You stopped looking after your appearance, watching your body shape, taking a shower twice a day, brushing your teeth as often as before, and putting on a sexy fragrance.
Well, maybe we went overboard and you didn’t fully stop doing every single thing that ever made you look like a great catch or an awesome bachelor when you first met. However, one of the reasons why your wife might have lost interest in intimacy could be because you started to neglect these aspects of yourself.
You may want to argue back and say that your wife doesn’t look the same as when you first met, either. But, keep in mind you’re the one asking about her sex drive here and not the other way around. Plus, she might start putting in more effort too if she saw you take interest in your physique.
And before you know it, you could be two gorgeous humans again having fun and exploring one another like the good old time. Keep in mind, that some women find it hard to ignore bad breath, an unkempt beard, and a hairy chest even when in the heat of the moment.
2- She’s extremely tired and needs help around the house:
Well, think about it this way: at least you’re well-rested, happy, and comfortable enough to be asking and wondering about intimacy. some people (your wife, namely) don’t have that luxury and they barely have enough hours to balance all the responsibilities, duties, and work that they have to accomplish in a day.
So by the time this type of person will go to bed, they will be exhausted and the last thing on their mind would be intimacy. Their back hurts, they’re already planning the next day in their head, their feet are sore and their energy is drained.
Before you think about trying to initiate something or asking for something, make sure you spent a big part of your day helping your wife with her daily tasks. If she has a career or a job, then understand that she may be going through a stressful period at work. Be her confidant and best friend, ask about it, cheer her up, kiss her forehead, be supportive and then offer to massage her shoulders and see where it goes from there.
3- The romance and physical affection are dead:
Women love men who are romantic. They need a man who is passionate and caring. If you want her to desire you, then you will have to be romantic.
If you are not the romantic type, then there is nothing wrong with that. You do not have to be a romantic guy in order for your wife to love you, obviously. She clearly fell in love with you as you are, so if you were never the romantic type that’s okay.
But if you feel she does not desire you, then it is time for some changes and you must start putting in an effort. You can start by buying her flowers, a small piece of jewelry, or even writing a sweet note or card for her to find.
4- You don’t spend enough time together:
It’s possible that your wife does not desire you because you’re not even present. If you’re absent all the time and only ever come home once in a while, then it is only fair that she will not feel like she has an emotional bond or connection with you anymore.
For women to get physical or intimate with someone out of choice, they need that emotional connection to be there, first. Unless a woman is obliged, forced, or doing it for a job, chances are she will not enjoy getting close physically to a man especially if they didn’t have any deep conversation for ages.
A lot of times, people are too busy with their jobs or other activities that they don’t have time for their partner. This will make the partner feel neglected and ignored. When this happens, the relationship won’t work because the needs of both partners will not be met.
5- You’re reading too much into it:
The truth is, most wives actually love their husbands and enjoy being intimate with them. They just don’t desire them sexually as much as the husbands do.
So, maybe you’re just being too demanding. Consider the fact that she may be thinking you two have an amazing and beautiful sex life, from her perspective, and that all these ideas are just coming into your head because of a lack of communication.
We should not assume that women stop desiring intimacy because they inevitably lose interest in their partners altogether or because they are unhappy with their marriage.
The reality is that for many women, the physical act of sex may still be pleasurable, but the emotional aspect has been lost over time. Check out our article for a few relationship goals for couples to achieve in order to come out stronger and more connected!