While an open relationship may sound like a great idea in theory, in practice, it can be always draining, frustrating, and devastating. This is especially true if only one partner is given the right to act like the relationship is open. Whether this was agreed on by both partners or not, this type of relationship can quickly turn toxic and build resentment.
What’s more, jealousy is practically inevitable in any open relationship; even if it wasn’t one-sided. Even if both partners are okay with one of them seeing other people, it can be difficult to watch the person you care about being intimate with someone else. Ultimately, open relationships, in general, are not for everyone.
However, one-sided open relationships are big traps and it’s pretty safe to say that they’re for nobody at all. If you’re considering entering into one still, then make sure you continue reading this article. This way, you’ll find out more reasons to never accept this type of situation or agree to it.
5 Reasons to never accept being in a one-sided relationship:
In this article, we assume that you’re the partner that isn’t benefiting from the one-sided open relationship that they agreed to. In other words, we consider that your partner is seeing others while being in a relationship with you whilst you’re exclusively committed to your relationship.
Obviously, this is not a situation that is fair or just, and even though you may have agreed to it in a moment of weakness or because of a lapse of judgment it’s not healthy to stay in such a position. So, here are a few reasons why you should refuse a one-sided relationship:
1- It’s not fair:
Being in a one-sided open relationship can be tough. You have to be loyal to your partner, even though they are seeing other people. If you’re willing to be loyal and don’t want to date other people, because you’re focused on your relationship then your partner should be doing the same.
It can be unfair and unjust if they have the right to do things that you’re not willing or are not gonna be doing. If you’re not comfortable with your partner seeing other people, then an open relationship, in general, is probably not for you.
You should not shy away from demanding what you want or letting your partner know that you have changed your mind regarding your situation.
2- You learn to lie to yourself about your true feelings:
You might think that being in a one-sided open relationship would be the best of both worlds. You get to date or be with that one person you like the most and your partner gets to keep seeing others if they want and not feel suffocated. However, feeling suffocated out of being loyal to the one and only person you love is not normal.
if your partner feels like they’re missing out if they commit to an exclusive relationship with you, it may just mean that you’re not their type or they don’t think you’re worthy of commitment. They may commit later if they meet someone they truly like but for now, they probably don’t mind being with you and using you while still doing what they want freely. In others words, they have nothing to lose by being with you so why not?!
You need to be honest with yourself. Are you really okay with sharing your partner? And, why are they not happy with being with you alone and committing? Is it their nature or is it just that you’re not the one for them and they know it?
If you’re not honest, then a one-sided open relationship is not for you. You also need to be honest about your motives and the true reasons your partner is acting a specific way regardless of what excuses they say. You need to be sure that you’re okay with the idea of having your partner date other people. If you’re not, then putting yourself in such a difficult and crushing situation is unfair to you and you don’t deserve it.
An open relationship can put a lot of strain on even the strongest of couples. So if you’re not prepared to handle that, then it’s probably not a good idea to enter into one. Also, keep in mind that someone who lies to themselves about their feelings will never truly be happy because they cannot figure out their true wishes, dreams, and goals. It’s hard to find out who we truly are, what we truly want, and work toward it if we’re constantly in denial or lying to ourselves.
3- You may feel your partner is being manipulative and unjust:
You and your partner have been dating for a while, and things seem to be going well. But then, your partner drops a bombshell: they want to have an open relationship. You’re not sure how to feel about this but don’t want to lose your partner because you truly love them. So you end up being forced indirectly to agree to a one-sided open relationship where they get to see other people but you don’t, simply because you’re not interested in anyone other than your partner.
If this is what happens and how you ended up considering or being in this type of relationship then it’s understandable to think that your partner’s intentions and character are questionable. Did they do all this just to get a free pass to cheat on you knowingly? Are they manipulating you and forcing you into a situation you find unbearable but cannot say it? No matter what angle we take this story from, your partner in this case always looks like the villain.
On the one hand, you trust your partner and you don’t want to lose them. But on the other hand, you may feel like your partner is being conniving, cruel, evil, and unjust. If you’re not sure what to do or where to turn, the most important thing to do in this situation is to communicate with your partner. Talk about your feelings and concerns, and try to reach a compromise that works for both of you.
No matter what you do, a one-sided open relationship is not a solution you want to consider in this scenario, so stand up for yourself, even if it means throwing an ultimatum at your partner. If you lose your partner, you’ll probably not be as sad as you think you’d be.
4- It will destroy your self-esteem:
It’s pretty common knowledge that one-sided open relationships never work out in the long run. It’s not fair to the person that is loyal and genuine, and it will eventually lead to heartbreak and feelings of guilt.
If you’re thinking about entering into one, then take into consideration that it may destroy your self-esteem. You’ll always be wondering if you’re good enough for your partner and why they chose to do such a thing and couldn’t simply be content with you alone.
It’s also emotionally draining to constantly be competing with other people for your partner’s attention. In the end, it’s just not worth it. So save yourself the pain and find someone who is willing to commit to you fully.
5- You will waste time being in this type of relationship:
You will waste time being in this type of relationship. You will be constantly wondering what your partner is doing, who they are with, and if they are being honest with you. You will never have the peace of mind that comes with being in a monogamous relationship. In addition, you will always be at risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection.
You may also find yourself in an emotionally abusive relationship, as your partner may try to control your behavior or use you as a pawn in their own game. After all, they will not want to lose their only source of stability and the only person they go back to in-between partners and other flings.
Ultimately, an open one-sided relationship is not worth the hassle and heartache. Especially when we consider that even in relationships that are open for both partners to do what they want, there will still be jealousy and drama that will unfold. You would be better off finding a partner who is willing to commit to you exclusively.