Do you ever feel like your family doesn’t care about you? That they don’t understand you or support you the way you need them to? Well, you’re not alone. In fact, the reason this is common is that we don’t choose who our family is the same way we choose who our friends are, for instance.
And, this could mean that sometimes our family members’ personalities and thoughts don’t align with ours or are not compatible with ours, so we’re left feeling outcast and unappreciated. This can be really tough to deal with. But let’s not jump to conclusions or think our family doesn’t care about us at the smallest inconvenience, either.
While family can be great, sometimes it is true that they can also be the absolute worst and hinder our progress in life or even success. So how do you recognize a family that actually truly doesn’t care for you from one that is just too easy-going, incompatible with you, or non-affectionate? Well, read on to find out.
A few signs your family doesn’t care about you:
1- They regularly criticize or dismiss your opinions and ideas:
It can be difficult to feel like you belong in a family if your opinions and beliefs are constantly being criticized. If you find yourself in this situation, it may be a sign that your family doesn’t care about what you have to say or what you think. They probably think that you didn’t achieve much in life to prove your intelligence and so until then, none of your opinions or ideas are valued enough or taken seriously.
In this case, it may feel like they’re more interested in criticizing you than listening to what you have to say but that’s not true. Sometimes, we cannot really blame others if we truly have proven to have poor judgment in life or didn’t succeed in our career and proven ourselves in any way, yet. Yes, it would be great if your family didn’t need any proof or evidence to have faith in you and just believe that you’re worthy of listening to.
However, keep in mind that given the fact that they probably have lived with you since you were an infant, maybe they still see you as their little baby. Especially since your family saw you grow up, day by day, they probably still have an image of you being a little child or a dependent rather than an authoritative independent figure or someone they can take seriously. This will especially be the case if you still have not left the family’s nest nor do you rent separately from them or provide for yourself at least.
2- They don’t seem interested in what’s going on in your life:
If you feel like your family doesn’t care about you, it can be a tough pill to swallow. After all, family is supposed to be the group of people who are supposed to love and support you no matter what. But sometimes, families can be toxic and show no interest in what happens to you or in your life.
If your family members don’t ask you about your day-to-day happenings, it may be a sign that they don’t really care about you. If they don’t support your dreams and aspirations and follow up with you to see whether you succeeded in landing your dream job for instance, then they probably don’t care.
If your family members regularly put you down or try to dissuade you from pursuing your goals, or even don’t know what your dreams are in the first place then it’s bad news. It might be because they don’t even ask or take interest in your personality or life, and that could simply be because they have a low opinion of you and what your life would look like anyway. Again, it’s likely because they don’t believe in you and don’t think there will be anything worth knowing about your life anyway.
It’s likely that they think your life is boring and there’s nothing impressive or exciting you’ll be achieving any time soon so they simply don’t care to ask or follow up. They would only ever show up if you actually turn out to be the next superstar of the century for instance, and after the fact, but wouldn’t have been there to support you in your journey.
And, this doesn’t just apply to your career or professional life but it also applies to your love life and any aspect of your life, unfortunately.
3- They don’t make an effort to spend time with you:
You’re always the one giving, and never receiving. If you’re the one who is always giving emotionally, financially, or otherwise, it can be a sign that your family doesn’t care about your needs.
If you’re also always the one reaching out, taking the initiative, and going out of your way to meet, stay in touch and spend time together; then you have to stop and wonder if they’d reciprocate your efforts if you stopped.
Another sign that your family doesn’t care about you in this way is if they regularly cancel plans with you or neglect to include you in important events. This is extreme and won’t be common, as far too few families will be so careless ad to make someone feel left out consistently. It can make you feel like you’re not a priority for them if they keep trying to cancel or re-schedule meeting you for any and every reason.
If you’re finding that your family isn’t meeting your needs, making you feel heard supported, appreciated, and well-surrounded; it may be time to look for support elsewhere. There are many ways to build a supportive network, even if your family isn’t part of it.
4- They don’t show you any affection or appreciation:
Some families are less affectionate than others. They may not show any affection to their members, or they may do so only sparingly. This can be due to a variety of reasons, ranging from cultural differences to personal preferences. whatever the reason, it’s important to remember that every family is different, and there is no right or wrong way to express one’s feelings and love.
So if your family isn’t always the best at showing affection, you should consider giving it the benefit of the doubt before you label it as “not caring about you”. Ultimately, the most important thing is that families will show love and support for one another in whatever way works best for them.
It could be cooking for one another, helping each other revise for exams, calling every day, or gathering for important dates and events. So try and focus on these little gestures, if any, rather than just feeling sad about the fact that you didn’t grow up in an affectionate home like your peers may have.
In the end, family is supposed to be a source of strength, not a source of stress. If your family isn’t supportive, affectionate, and appreciative don’t be afraid to reach out to other people who can provide the love and attention you need.
In families that are less affectionate, the concept of giving and receiving love may be foreign. The children in these families may grow up without learning how to express or receive love. As a result, they may have difficulty forming close relationships later in life. They may also have trouble showing affection to their own children. While there is nothing wrong with being less affectionate, it is important to be aware of the effects it can have.
If any of this sounds familiar, it’s possible that your family isn’t affectionate or just doesn’t care about you as much as you thought they did. It can be a really tough situation to be in, but remember that there are other people in the world who do care about you and will accept you for who you are.
What to do when your family doesn’t care about you:
Keep in mind, that just because your family is different or doesn’t always express their love for you doesn’t mean that they don’t care about you. They might just not be very good at expressing their feelings but it doesn’t mean they wouldn’t care if something sinister happened to you tomorrow.
In the end, if it seems like your family is neglectful or unsupportive, you can consider talking to them about it or trying to include them more in your life. You can try creating a new bond with them by telling them about your dreams, and goals and involving them closely in your life.
Or, if it doesn’t work, it is also okay to just distance yourself until you feel better or until you learn to accept that they’re the way they are. Until then you can check this article out on what to do about evil and heartless relatives that will always be in your life if that’s actually your issue.